X2: X-Men United does everything but make mutants
look cool. It does, however, leave us with a variety of
thoughts about them. I’d like to share a few of mine
with you—stupid, corny, peachy, and lame. Sure, I did
think a few of the women-mutants were good-looking, but
that was probably the most positive comment I have about
them. This is not an interesting movie, it is an ugly
one. I walked into the theatre prepared for an
action-packed, summer-movie extravaganza. Hold on there,
did I say action-packed? X2 actually has very
little action, and is chocked-full of mind-numbing
dialogue. And, hey, wait a minute—did I say it was a
summer movie? 20th Century Fox ought to check
they’re calendars. This film was released on the second
of May!
The entire cast is back, with many new stars along with
them, for the sequel to a movie that never deserved to
be continued on. But, the interesting concept, following
after the plot of one of my favorite comic books, led me
to believe that I should give the series another try. I
went into the theatre with open expectations, regardless
of the bad impression X2’s predecessor, X-Men,
left with me. Unfortunately, X2 turned out to be
just as dull as X-Men, and sometimes even more
so. On the flipside of things, there are some reasons
why some people should check it out. A great performance
by Patrick Stuart, some revolutionizing special effects,
and the appeal of Alan Cumming’s interpretation of his
Nightcrawler, earn X2 a solid two buckets. With
caution, I’m going to suggest that everyone rent it,
just because of the campy and likeable cheap thrills.
The direction is crappy; just awful. Brian Singer tries
to light the entire piece in a very odd way, which makes
the film unblinkingly, hard to focus on. The video is so
grainy and bizarre, it looks like he is trying to make
it appear as if the film were shot in digital video. I
would’ve believed that it was, if it hadn’t been for the
miraculously stunning special effects, which ultimately
make this the movie that it is. X2 is always all
over the map. The plot is jumbled, the dialogue is
everywhere, and to top it all off, the characters are
improperly introduced (viewers who haven’t seen the
first X-Men will have a hard time following it
for the first 15 minutes). This aspect factored in, in a
very odd way. It led me to, at times, love the film; and
at others, hate it.
Using the information I’ve just provided you with, it’s
not hard to guess that next, I will be criticizing the
writing. I have read quite a few editions of the X-Men
comic books, and they are much more creative that X2.
The stories in the comic are exciting and fun, while
both of the films (and the third one that’s obviously on
the way), are ridiculously mediocre. This is one of the
most dreadful adaptations, descending off of a Marvel
creation, so far. Don’t misinterpret the point that I’m
trying to get across, though. Not all of X2 is
murky and disappointing. Some of the joy that readers
are brought when reading the comic book is carried over,
when putting it onto film. Unfortunately, not enough of
this joy is saved for X2 to, on the whole, be a
worthwhile trip to your local cinema. The gigantic
running length is mostly to blame for this. It’s
extremely hard to make a two hour and fifteen minute
film, let alone, try to make a full-blown,
always-entertaining action-flick, is almost unheard of.
Sure, teens will fall for it, and it will do abnormally
well at the box-office—but X2 is just not worthy
of a theatre trip. It’s proficient in the visual effects
department and has some cool scenes and great
performances. The problem is that it can never break
away from the world of science-fiction clichés. There is
potential in the material it provides us with, but I
will be surprised if it is ever executed well. I’m about
to see X2’s rival competitor, The Matrix
Reloaded, in about two hours. I hope it will be much
better. Right now, as it stands, the dreary year for
film continues on. Hopeless films will continue to leave
me unimpressed when walking out of the local theatre. I
won’t go as far as to say that X2 is as bad of
the other disasters I’ve seen this year, but it
certainly isn’t what I would call “good.” I’ve seen
twenty-one films this year. I’ve liked eleven of them.
You do the math.
-Danny, Bucket Reviews