
(Revised to a great degree on August 8, 2004. Revised entries added in 
blue. Position changes in
green.)
 
NOTE: We reserve the right to update these lists at anytime, with proper 
notifications made.
Reviews for most of the films found on these lists 
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  2003: The Year In Film
  
  By: Danny Baldwin
  
   
  
       
  Too many people say "the numbers speak for themselves" far too often, but this 
  time, the phrase is appropriate. In 2002, I had 19 four-bucket-rated films. In 
  2003, I had 11. The number of three-and-a-half's has significantly decreased 
  as well, even though I hate to put my faith in something so arbitrary as the 
  rating system. The answer as to why this was the case couldn't be simpler. 
  Major studios' "commerciality over quality" method was used much more often 
  than it had been in previous years. I believe there were more sequels last 
  year than any other in the past decade. Despite this, the year's box-office 
  total still decreased, compared to that of 2002. Most moviegoers had to rely 
  on indies to provide them with quality entertainment, and chain theatres began 
  to play more and more of them, as time went on. While I was overjoyed to see 
  this happen, I also felt grave sorrow for Hollywood's many losses. I predict 
  that 2004 will be a great year for epics; even without The Lord of the 
  Rings, pictures like 
  
  Hidalgo 
  and The Alamo will dominate. However, I still think it'll be a mediocre 
  365 days for the majority of motion pictures. The lineups at art-houses don't 
  look too hot either, but only time will tell. We can only hope the state of 
  cinema will improve in the near future, even though it's unlikely. And so, 
  let's take a look at the forty-one films that are worth your time, the twenty-four that aren't, and s'more lists and stuff. Let the reading begin!
  Go Directly to The Top 10 ->.
   
Most Overrated and 
Underrated
Overrated: 
28 Days Later, All The Real 
Girls, Elf, Dirty Pretty Things, Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World, Matchstick Men, 
Once Upon a Time In Mexico, Out of Time, 
The Rundown, Secondhand Lions, Spellbound, X2: X-Men United.
Underrated:
Anything Else, Charlie’s Angels 2: Full Throttle, 
Hollywood 
Homicide, How 
to Deal, The Human Stain, The Life of David Gale, A Mighty Wind, Old School, 
Tears of the Sun, Veronica Guerin.
 
      
The Worst
11. Wrong Turn—Eliza 
Dushku gets trapped in the woods. Sounds fun, eh? Sexy, scary, and ultimately 
disposable, right? I wish it was that way. But of course, there are some 
inbred-cannibals and then some completely conventional plot twists and all that 
jazz added to the mix. How could I have thought that the filmmakers would’ve 
left them out? Wrong Turn begins like a classic B-movie, corny, 
but spooky and tense, thriving upon its “assets” to full capability. However, 
before long, it becomes a Z-movie. There’s nothing enjoyable about this 
creation; it’s a vile and pointless exercise in brutal hilarity. Even if I was a 
fan of the slasher flick, I don’t even think I’d be able to tolerate this one. 
I’m not sure what exactly it wants to accomplish, but I know that it doesn’t do 
it. I’ve made a lot of wrong turns in my life, but this one was by far the 
worst.
10. The Matrix 
Revolutions—I am, truthfully, surprised that this isn’t classified, by 
most, as an animated movie. It’s only about special effects; one by one, a 
machine kills another machine, and so on. Why is this so interesting? It isn’t, 
but Warner Brothers has seemingly brainwashed society and made everyone think it 
is. Violence can be a very strong and effective element in film (take Kill 
Bill: Volume One, for example), but here, it’s brutally beaten and abused. I 
enjoyed one scene in the entire picture, and it included very little killing. 
But, somehow, I was able to dodge almost all the bullets that The Matrix 
Revolutions shot at me, and came out of the theatre in one piece. To think 
that the first two installments in the franchise were actually good never ceases 
to stun me.
9. Malibu’s Most 
Wanted—I clearly was on some kind of heavy drug when I had mistaken 
Jamie Kennedy for a talented guy, after seeing the first season of his 
television show. I’m not so sure I can think of a more generic and clichéd topic 
for a movie than white rappers. The problem with this movie is that we’ve seen 
everything in it before; there is not a single drop of originality to be found 
in its contents. Hence, I would be mad if I actually thought it was funny. (I 
laughed only twice when viewing it). There are some motion pictures that would 
probably seem much better stoned. This is not one of them. It’s a wretched watch 
in any state of mind. If there is a better reason for avoiding it, I don’t know 
what it is.
8. Beyond Borders—Despite 
starring Angelina Jolie and Clive Owen, this piece of trash was a complete 
failure, and its terrible box-office numbers did it justice. From the false 
melodrama to the disgusting and offensive images of a starving Africa, which 
make for an undercooked and laughable political statement, there is nothing 
rewarding in the film except, perhaps, the look of the leading actress. In a 
perfect world, I wouldn't have to stand this stupid kind of teary, preachy, 
wannabe hardship, because it wouldn't exist. Throw in a hysterical Jolie pose 
after hearing the click of a land-mine, and you've got yourself an awful flick.
7. Legally Blonde 2: 
Red, White, and Blonde—UUGGHH! Reese Witherspoon, I thought it would be 
impossible for you to make me cry! The first Legally Blonde was witty, 
charming, and downright hysterical, but this mess is inexcusable—a dopey, crude, 
unfunny and obnoxious creation. It’s not diverting—it’s atrocious. All the 
bubbly characters have gone to waste in this script; hardly any of it can be 
redeemed by the cute and loveable leading actress. While watching Red, White, 
and Blonde, the color pink was the least apparent in my mind. My brain was 
consumed by black and blue, shriveling in the embarrassment of witnessing this 
disaster. Did we really need a sequel here? While it may’ve been a good idea 
money-wise, it makes me want to take back everything I said about the first 
installment in the franchise. However, I find the idea of a third Blonde 
strangely appealing. It could, quite possibly, block the nastiness of this 
insufferable piece of crap from my mind.
6. Kangaroo Jack—I 
guess I predicted that I’d hate this movie for the right reasons, but for some 
reason, it’s really gotten to me over the past twelve months. Even though it’s a 
crude and evil exercise that no kids should be able to see, there’s something 
disheartening about deeming Kangaroo Jack with a low score, because its 
intentions are is (somehow) in the right place. The problem with the whole thing 
is that it isn’t funny; it’s like a wannabe Scooby Doo, which, in itself, 
makes it dead on arrival. During all of Kangaroo Jack, you notice that 
the cast actually has some talent, though—talent that’s been wasted on an 
utterly repulsive project. January releases are usually abysmal and forgettable 
because of their poor quality, but this one has left a scar on my body. It’s a 
critic’s worst nightmare, like Chinese Water torture only with knives dropping 
from their holder, rather than liquid from a bottle.
5. Bruce Almighty—Most 
critics and audiences hailed this one, and I’m still sitting here in my chair, 
ranting about its horrendous execution, not understanding it in the least bit. 
To be completely honest, I laughed quite a lot at the first thirty minutes of 
material this film had to offer. The idea was witty, the actors are skilled, and 
there was nothing really wrong with the story itself. But, who wants to teach 
morals and all that hokey shit in a movie that’s supposed to be naughty, 
oblivious, and hysterically preposterous? That’s what the multiple writers of 
Bruce Almighty tried to do, and it is certainly what made me hate their 
wicked creation. Jennifer Anniston cries, Jennifer Anniston talks about praying, 
Jennifer Anniston kisses Jim Carey. How in the world is that entertaining? This 
flick should be darker and more malevolent. Why people bought into its spell, 
and were conned into liking it, is beyond me. I, really, have no idea. Please. 
Tell. Me. 
God. Now.
4. Scary Movie 3—Also 
known as David Zucker Brutally Beats His Admirers From Airplane!. I 
laughed once, and giggled twice. The saddest part of it all is that the one 
scene I actually found to be hysterical involved Jenny McCarthy and Pamela 
Anderson. The word “bad” will no longer be alluding to the Michael Jackson 
album, but the sheer torture that this film provoked. It, however, helped me, in 
realizing how great a comedy The School of Rock was, which I saw the week 
before. I can at least commend it for that. Despite the tastelessness of it, 
this one actually managed to pull in over a hundred million dollars of dough at 
the box office. There will be a Scary Movie 4 released in 2004. Let’s 
hope that a fifth doesn’t ever see release. However, worse could happen. Take 
for example: Scary Movie vs. Not Another Teen Movie. Place your 
bets.
3. Bad Boys II—What 
happened to the good ‘ol Martin Lawrence? Okay, he was alright in National 
Security earlier last year, but enough’s enough. When watching this effort, 
or lack thereof, I was truly amazed. I never was aware that any director, even 
Michael Bay, could get away with making a movie with less than 1,000 words of 
dialogue. Not to mention, more than a fifth of those are “fuck.” And, of course, 
with that much action, and so little talking, I was sure I’d find one of two 
things to be true by the picture’s end. (1) The dialogue was relatively 
well-written, albeit in short quantities. (2) The action was entertaining, 
because there was so much of it. When the credits began to roll, however, I 
wasn’t confident of either, in the least bit. I was bored for the entire running 
length (over two hours!), left completely exhausted by the film’s sheer 
mediocrity.
2. My Boss’s Daughter—Wow! 
The second David Zucker “film” on my list is also the second-to-worst one of the 
entire year. Not that watching Ashton Kutcher attempt to be funny isn’t painful 
enough, this movie, a disgusting and wannabe confection that tastes like 
something from the month-old bakery, is thoroughly awful. It’s so bad that the 
audience doesn’t even sympathize for the cast, who are humiliating themselves, 
but those behind the camera who had to deal with them while shooting. The whole 
thing is set up like a mediocre sitcom episode, but turns out to be much worse 
than that. The first scene actually had hooked me in, and allowed me to think 
it’d be a clichéd, but enjoyable romp. However, the sheer terror of what 
followed overwhelmed me, and made me want to vomit. There were a few positive 
reviews for this abominable creation, and I’m pretty confident that those 
critics were high. Or drunk. Or just like Tara Reid. I’m not sure which one to 
hope it was.
1. Jeepers Creepers II—It’s 
always customary that I never write much about my worst pick of the year, 
because I never seem to want to reflect back on its awfulness, so I will stay 
true to the tradition, and make this snappy. The first Jeepers Creepers 
was terrible, opening with a cool ending, and finally copping out and losing 
sight of what it needed to do. This second installment proves that it could’ve 
been a lot worse. This is the only movie I rated zero buckets in 2003, and I 
have good reason for doing so. It’s predictable, poorly acted, poorly scripted, 
poorly directed, and poorly scored. Not one part of Jeepers Creepers II 
is scary; I don’t think I would’ve even been frightened by “The Creeper” when I 
was two years old. There are obviously no redeeming qualities in it, leaving no 
reason to see it. If there’s any movie that deserves to be damned to hell, it’s 
this one.
* * *
Dishonorable Mentions 
(In Alphabetical Order)
Equally filled with 
stereotypes of the gay man and the straight one, Boat Trip 
was an unfunny and disastrous wreck, albeit occasionally sweet. The only person 
in the cast whose work wasn’t unbearable to view was Roselyn Sanchez. The rest 
of the performers are, well, frankly, terrible.
I have no clue as to what Cabin Fever wanted to be about, but I'm 
not so sure I want to. It did have some hysterical parts, which were quite 
counterproductive, but ultimately ended up being a disaster, simply because of 
the terrible final act. Eli Roth has talent. It's just wasn't put to use here.
Daddy Day Care 
had me convinced that Eddie Murphy was no longer funny, until his other project 
that was released later in the year, The Haunted Mansion, came out, and 
proved that he still had comic talent. This made it clear that the fault of this 
film was all in the script.
The nasty 
and vile Dreamcatcher started out fine, and was headed in the 
right direction, until stupid sci-fi twists ensued. It's amazing that Stephen 
King crafted "Shit Weasels" with intelligence. It's not so amazing that this 
movie doesn't craft "Shit Weasels" with intelligence.
Dumb and Dumberer: When 
Harry Met Lloyd 
was better than the original film, and had me going for quite a while, but it 
was so clichéd and unoriginal, all my laughter was crediting were the films that 
came before it, for they were the ones that originally crafted the scenarios and 
humor featured here.
From Justin to Kelly 
should be on my bottom ten list, but it’s just so goddamn sweet and innocent in 
its intentions, it pains me to even include it here. Yeah: bad acting, bad 
script, and bad direction—but, even though it’s terrible, I don’t want to down 
it. I could actually probably watch it again. Wait. I wouldn’t go that far.
Film 
infatuated fools took Gerry as an intelligent study, but I didn't 
look at it in any other light than a boring one. What's so interesting about two 
guys who walk around the desert for over an hour and a half and barely say a 
word? There are no landscapes in sight, so the beautiful cinematography doesn't 
help any. Gus Van Sant should be ashamed of himself.
Despite having some very 
funny moments, Johnny English, the spy-spoof starring Rowan 
Atkinson, was a complete waste of time. Clichéd, uneasy, and conventional in its 
attempts, it’s a movie to forget.
In my review for The 
League of Extraordinary Gentlemen I wrote that I would love to forget it 
until there came a time to make my worst of the year list. Now’s that time and 
it has escaped the bottom ten, but still has an awful place in my heart. It is, 
perhaps, the most disappointing movie of the year.
A Man Apart 
was a pointless exploration of the Mexican drug underworld, with, guess who? VIN 
DIESEL. Thoroughly awful and chocked full of unnecessary characters, it’s 
nowhere near a pleasurable experience.
MTV's 
production, The Real Cancun, celebrated getting drunk, having sex 
with people who you barely know, and running topless in the wild streets of 
Mexico on Spring Break. As much as it may say about youth in America, I don't 
think it meant to be a social statement, and instead endorsed all that it 
exhibited. Which, if you didn't know already, is very wrong.
What were critics thinking 
when they gave The Secret Lives of Dentists good reviews? Okay, 
yeah, it creates a realistic depiction of life in the shoes of a suburban 
family. The only problem is it doesn’t do anything with this. Wow, isn’t it 
amazing?
Only the abysmal script of
A View From The Top could destroy the talents of Gwyneth Paltrow 
and Michael Myers. I went in with high expectations, and I admit that, but I had 
no idea that it would be this bad. The humor fails, the acting is 
disgraceful, and the dialogue is easily some of the worst of all-time.
 
      
The Best
11. Seabiscuit—There 
have been very few moments in my life when I’ve wanted to give Hollywood a 
great, big hug, but watching this film was one of them. It may be melodramatic 
and cheesy at times, but when in full form, it’s a wondrous and emotional 
experience, packed with triumph and a distinct sense of hope. It’s an amazingly 
captivating, and heart-stopping experience, almost containing the same qualities 
as a top-notch action film. When watching this movie, audiences root for the 
horse that it is named after, as if they had thousands of dollars betting on 
him. Most of this is because of the strong performances, which are abundant in 
every corner of the cast-lineup. Jeff Bridges and Chris Cooper are terrific in 
their supporting roles, providing the scenes they’re in with a feeling of 
extravagance. But Tobey Maguire is the best in the film. He really comes out of 
his shell, and perhaps, gives the best breakthrough performance of the year. 
Seabiscuit starts out slow, but finishes far too fast. Movies that are worth 
using cheesy lines over are seldom come by, but this is one of them. It hooks us 
in and never lets go until the last frame of video has played.
10. The Hulk—Woo-hoo! 
I’ve found a comic book movie that I actually love, and it couldn’t feel 
any better. This is because of one man—director Ang Lee; he brings such a 
darkness about the material, an artsy flare to a mainstream film. This flick is 
more about human psychology than it is action, which is kind of remarkable, in 
this genre. There is creativity in its context, making for a much more enjoyable 
and riveting experience than most would expect. This is a motion picture that 
focuses on character development and a growing story; it actually leads up to 
something, unlike the rest of its kind (but, by then, the teenage boys had 
already walked out). However, the plot isn’t all that’s focused on—the special 
effects are pretty damn great, too. When projected, the screen is consumed by 
everyone’s favorite angry green giant, which left a grin on most every tasteful 
viewer’s face. I, really, can’t think of a better time I had at the movies last 
year.
9. The Quiet American—We’ve 
had our share of war movies that are about war. Battle after battle, emotions 
run high; they’re splendidly wonderful, but we know the drill. This movie is 
technically a 2002 release, but I’ve included it on this list, for it’s 
completely astounding. It takes us into a Vietnam war, before us Americans were 
involved. And it’s not really “about” the war, either. The Quiet American 
is a piece comprised of mood, setting, and romance—a miraculously one-of-a-kind 
creation. It wasn’t as successful as it should’ve been at the box office, and 
crappy distribution by Miramax (sorry) basically threw it in the trash. Director 
Phillip Noyce has made a hypnotically stirring film, because everyone can 
strangely relate to it. And, it wouldn’t be half the film it is without the 
shocking ending, which is, like the rest of the film, pure genius.
8. Whale Rider—Pleasingly, 
this movie found a market in the U.S., and was one of the 
most successful indies of the year. Starring a brilliant cast of New Zealander 
no-names, it is not only one of the best films of the year overall, but should 
ream to be responsible for the successful careers of many performers. While most 
critics have bluntly followed the marketing strategy for the film, and called it 
a supreme “girl power” flick, the meaning is much deeper than that. It’s a study 
of the tension in genetically-drawn relationships, and the way in which fondness 
and happiness are able to overcome it. Whale Rider is magically mystical, 
a treat for the whole family.
7. The Station Agent—Have 
you ever been mad at the world? Society? One’s taste in humor? Try being sick of 
it everyday, like Fin, the main character in this movie. He’s a dwarf, hence 
constantly the butt of peoples jokes, the subject of their malevolent fun. 
However, before long, he soon stumbles upon to two unlikely friends, who are 
loyal and true to him, unlike almost everyone else he’s ever met in his life. 
Along with Fin, these two, named Olivia and Joe, build a genuine relationship 
that feels insanely real. There’s true beauty in The Station Agent; it’s 
overflowing in passions for life, forgiveness, and friendship. In it, hardly 
anything is ever lost, but much is gained—the events which take place here are 
merely adding to the characters lives, not replacing their past memories. 
This film is purely honest, one that can be watched excessively. It’s a joy to 
behold and a miraculous experience. Bravo!
6. Thirteen—“Holy 
shit” is about all I have to say. While many may call this movie sick and 
twisted, and put it in the same category as Kids, it’s completely real. 
From the get-go, I had my doubts that any director would embrace this type of 
shocking material, but Catherine Hardwicke does so, with flying colors. First 
penned by Nikki Reid, who has just turned sixteen, it’s a bitingly cold 
slice-of-life; so pure and well-performed, it will leave a haunting effect on 
everyone that views it. Speaking as a teenager, I cannot think of how a movie 
could be more realistic than Thirteen. I witness the people, who take 
part in the activities that the main characters in this flick do, talking about 
their wild doings everyday, yet the material still left me in awe. The most 
admirable thing about this film is that it doesn’t provide any easy answers, and 
accepts its contents as sad facts. Irreversible was deemed the “toughest 
film to take” last year by most, but it’s a piece of cake to experience compared 
to this.
      
5. The Lizzie McGuire Movie—This 
addition to my list will definitely ream to be the most controversial, and I 
couldn't care any less. After five viewings of it, and soon to be six, I can 
conclude that this is a timeless children's classic, even though it will sadly 
never be universally hailed by anyone but pre-teen girls. I may not fall into 
that demographic, but I enjoyed it tremendously, and was even inspired by its 
true excellence. Director Jim Fall crafts every frame of the movie with 
care, and the musical numbers in it are both enchanting to the ear-drums and 
surprisingly metaphorical and meaningful. In the leading role, Hilary Duff 
couldn't be any more charming; this film represented a turning point in her 
career, in which she became a tremendous actress, instead of just a perky 
addition to Hollywood. Now, we just have to convince her to make a masterpiece 
for adults, now that she's mastered the kids' half of the map. A Cinderella 
Story shows that she's decided to keep treading the same water for the time 
being, but nevertheless, I really couldn't be any happier. Duff's greatest work 
has yet to be seen, despite her already glowing and flowing efforts. The 
Lizzie McGuire Movie will shock you with its deceptive twist, like a noir 
for the 'tween set. I took it at something shallower than surface value the 
first time I saw it, and hated it, but as I looked deeper with chance repeat 
values, I loved embracing it. Now, it works for me as both simple entertainment, 
as well as a study of the pubescent mind and its hopes, dreams, and ambitions. 
To top it all off, the final scene is both touching and serves as a satisfying 
conclusion for what marked the end of the television show's run. I cannot say 
enough about this misunderstood, but masterful, intelligent delight of a motion 
picture. It's quite hysterical, in its own right, as well.
4. Nowhere In 
Africa—There 
are very few uplifting films about the Holocaust in existence, but we can add 
this one to the short list. Even though it isn’t much about the period in time 
itself, the setting makes for a great backdrop for the character study. This 
movie is about the evolution of one woman’s attitude towards life, and how the 
things surrounding her affect her character. She’s escaped persecution in Nazi 
Germany and fled to Africa with her family, only to be discriminative towards 
the natives there. However, as time moves on, and she becomes more aware of the 
happenings in her home country, her feelings change, and she begins to adapt to 
her new lifestyle. Nowhere in Africa is an amazing kaleidoscopic view of 
life and the world, showcased in a surreal setting. 
3. Lost In Translation—Bill 
Murray and Scarlett Johansson give the best performances of their careers in 
Sofia Coppola’s breathtaking, ingenious, and comically subtle masterpiece. The 
emotions in this film are genuine, and everyone can relate to them. It’s a 
mature blend of realist and imaginative cinema, highlighted by the serene 
location and a witty script. Rarely does a film come along that’s as poignant as 
this one, and we must cherish it simply because of this fact. It represents the 
utmost complexity in a simplistic setting, divinely engaging in every way, 
shape, and form. It’s touching and beautiful, and these two characteristics are 
the most important in every film, no matter what the genre. Their abundance here 
is simply amazing, and not to be taken for granted.
2. The Magdalene 
Sisters—Peter Mullan has created an insanely memorable and effective 
account of the terrible aspects of organized religion. There is an unspeakable 
horror amidst the chaos of the events featured in this motion picture. It 
creates an unexplainable realism in being so brutally honest with the audience. 
When experiencing The Magdalene Sisters, the seats in the movie theatre 
will appear to be nonexistent, the screen a big, white wall, and the exit-door 
closed shut, and locked on the other side. One truly feels like they’re 
experiencing the real deal. I was shaken with fear as the images in it washed 
over me, my vision clouded in sorrow. Every scene in this film is ravishingly 
memorable, and will stick with you for a very long time.
1. The Lord of the 
Rings: The Return of the King—I gazed at the screen, and was 
overwhelmed, watching this magnificent creation that words can hardly describe. 
“The Lord of the Rings” trilogy is a historical landmark; one with such a 
lasting significance and wondrous approach, it’s hard to deny that these films 
are some of the greatest of all time. We’ve reached new heights in visuals, 
power, emotions, and film’s relationship with music in witnessing them. The 
Return of the King is so bold and engaging, so profound and captivating, it 
sweeps all its viewers away, immersing them in the pure joy of a fantasy-world; 
one where the characters strive to do good, and thrive upon this very thing. We 
share their hopes and dreams with them, wrapping us up in the sheer beauty of 
the life that they live. When we watch these films, we are transported into the 
world of Middle-Earth, and there, we experience a triumph that is more true and 
faithful than anything we will ever experience in reality.
* * *
Honorable Mentions 
(In Alphabetical Order)
American Splendor, 
a biopic on the life of pessimistic underground comic-book writer Harvey Pekar 
was a unique joy to watch, telling the tale of a strangely heroic guy that’s no 
one’s hero.
Denys 
Arcand's illusive The Barbarian Invasions celebrated the joys of 
life, in a rather dismal situation. Human nature is a fantastic focus for this 
beautiful piece of only dialogue, with only a few crude gags and political 
cheap-shots holding it back from being great. A foreign gem.
Bend it like Beckham, 
the movie responsible for the now gigantic career of British actress Kiera 
Knightley was purely fantastic in every way. Whether it’s your first or fifth 
time watching it, it’s just as fun.
Blue Car 
was perhaps the most important film of the year—a terrifying look at sexual 
predators in the most unlikely of forms. Agnes Bruckner’s performance is a 
triumph.
The strange, cult likes of 
Bubba Ho-Tepp were absolutely hilarious, in every sense. Bruce 
Campell shined as a retired Elvis Presley, who tried to take down an evil, live 
mummy with a black John F. Kennedy, in possibly the funniest film of the year. 
The only regret I have is missing the Campell-Q&A, on the second day of its run 
in my local theatre. That would've been a blast.
Andrew Stanton’s amazing and 
imaginative creation Finding Nemo introduced us to the simple joy 
of humor, color, and interest. Ellen DeGeneres, Albert Brooks, and Willem Dafoe 
give spectacular voice-performances.
Errol Morris' provocative The Fog of War 
shows the horrors of war, but also why we need it, and what it solves. 
Consisting of Eleven Lessons from former politician and soldier, Robert M. 
McNamara, it's far better than Bowling For Columbine could've ever wished 
to be.
Audrey Tatou shred her 
Amelie-image in He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not, playing a woman 
obsessed with a man, brainwashing herself to believe she’s in a relationship 
with him, when she’s never even met him. The structure of the thing is effective 
and one-of-a-kind.
In Holes, a 
magical treat for the whole family, written for the screen by Louis Sachar, who 
adapted from his own award winning novel, we are told the tale of the curse that 
was put upon the men in the Yelnats family by Madame Zeroni. It follows the 
latest Yelnats boy, who is accused of stealing the shoes of Clyde 
“Sweet Feet” Livingston, a famous baseball player, right before they were about 
to be auctioned off at a homeless shelter. He’s sent to Camp Greenlake, where boys 
must dig a 5’ X 5’ hole everyday. Imaginative and lively.
House of Sand and Fog 
was a riveting and effective look at conflict and contrasting personalities, 
albeit contrived. It’s a wonderful fictional effort; one where we hope that the 
characters’ problems are resolved and even care for them, even if they aren’t 
great people. This, alone, is absolutely astounding.
The average immigrant story was 
told in a remarkable way in the masterful In America, with almost 
every bit of it told through the eyes of two young girls. The fairy-tale-like 
presence of the Djimon Hounsou character, Mateo, makes the movie.
World-class filmmaker documented an Afghani boy's hardships as he tried to leave 
the Middle East in In This World. It's more heartfelt than drama, 
and functions as an amazing study of world events, rather than a political 
lecture. Fully engrossing and quite a tearjerker, if I do say so, myself.
The Coen Brothers hit big 
again (in their own hearts) with Intolerable Cruelty, a 
hysterically witty comedy with two great leads, that no one went to see, 
unfortunately. It was entertaining, quirky, spicy, and zingy in the way it 
delivered.
Edward Zwick’s The 
Last Samurai, which starred Tom Cruise, was a miraculous look at two 
different cultures. It was as packed with emotion as it was visually impressive, 
making for a gorgeously moving epic.
The Matrix Reloaded 
surpassed the quality of the original film and exhibited some truly 
revolutionary and mind-blowing special-effects. Sadly, it was brutally destroyed 
six months later by the thoroughly awful third installment in the series, 
Revolutions.
Monster represented Charlize Theron's chance to shine, and she took it, 
and it paid off, as everyone knows by now, after the numerous awards she's 
received. While flawed in its heart, this is a terrifying and disturbing motion 
picture that will get a visceral, uncompromising reaction out of nearly all sane 
audience members.
In 
Mystic River, 
three childhood friends are reunited after the death of one’s daughter. Despite 
a few flaws, it is a powerful and riveting journey through death and the process 
of coping.
The Polish Brothers’ 
Nortfork transported audiences into a small town that’s being evacuated, 
because it’s soon to be submerged in the waters of a damn. Following the men 
leading the evacuation team, its elegant cinematography and creative symbolism 
play out in a striking fashion.
In 
Open Range, 
Kevin Costner’s return to the world of Westerns, the director crafted a 
beautiful tale of revenge. Robert Duvall put on one of the best supporting 
performances of the year.
Peter Pan
had just the 
stuff I needed as a five-year-old. It really sucks that it was made nine years 
late. However, I was still miraculously engaged in the lively action, and blown 
away by the beautifully enchanting visuals, despite the fact that I’m now 
fourteen. If this movie doesn’t bring the true kid out in every adult that views 
it, they’re certainly a hopeless cause.
Raising Victor Vargas 
managed to be a successful piece of realist cinema, unlike its competitor All 
the Real Girls, which was boring and dry. It should land the lead Victor 
Rasuk many more career opportunities in the future.
The 
experimental The Safety of Objects was a both a study of real 
suburban life, and quite an imaginary one, by its end. It worked in both ways, 
and nearly every performance in it is spot on, especially those of Timothy 
Olyphant and Glenn Close.
The Shape of Things
is classic Neil 
LaBute—a striking, colorful, witty, and twisty negative look into the world of 
relationships. Paul Rudd and Rachel Weisz give stellar performances, making this 
a completely terrific film.
The 
Son was a terrific picture from the Dardennes brothers, full of haunting 
tension, and moody, metaphorical scenes. The leading performances never gave 
into the audiences hopes for optimism, and the bleak world in which the 
characters embodied never shed a tear of melodrama. However, it ends on a note 
that feels to be surprisingly upbeat, deceptively.
David Cronenberg’s 
Spider was an interesting little creation about a schizophrenic man in a 
halfway house. Since Dennis “Spider” Cleg deceives us, the audience, about 
things, because his disease dements his view of real life, the truthful version 
of the story showcased in the film isn’t revealed until the very end.
Ken Loach’s indie-sleeper 
Sweet Sixteen presented an effective political statement, by only 
allowing audiences to observe. There’s an obvious bent to the screenplay, but 
it’s not an offensive one, as seen in scumbag left-winger Michael Moore’s 
Bowling for Columbine.
Swimming Pool, 
a sexual and spellbinding thriller from budding director Francois Ozon, was 
absolutely terrific, and should land young actress Ludivine Sagnier many career 
opportunities in the future. Every frame of this film had us intrigued and 
captivated until its end. If this doesn’t make a great for a great movie-going 
experience, it’s time to ask ourselves what we really want out of a film.
The third installment in the
Terminator series was an action-packed extravaganza and the 
perfect set-up for a fourth film in the series. As long as the flicks don’t 
become tired, I don’t want to see the franchise end anytime soon, with Arnold or without.
Marcus Nispel’s insane 
remake of Tobe Hoober’s The Texas Chainsaw Massacre transported 
audiences back into the world of classic, old-fashioned horror. It both scared 
the living daylights out of me and utilized an engaging style. Clichés and 
conventions aside, it was one hell of a ride.
* * *
Notable Films I Missed:
Ararat, Mambo Italiano, My Life Without Me, Party Monster, Stevie, Sylvia.
 
      
Best Performances
Listed in 
preferential order.
Best 
Actors (6): 
Rawiri Paratene in Whale Rider; Bill Murray in Lost in Translation; 
Paul Giamatti in American Splendor; Ben Kingsley in House of Sand and 
Fog; Jack Black in The School of Rock; Peter Dinklage in The 
Station Agent.
Best 
Actresses (8): 
Scarlett Johansson in Lost in Translation and Girl With A Pearl 
Earring; Evan Rachel Wood in Thirteen; Jennifer Connelly in 
House of Sand and Fog and The Hulk; Nora Jane Noone in The 
Magdalene Sisters; Keisha Castle-Hughes in Whale Rider; Hilary Duff 
in The Lizzie McGuire Movie, Nicole Kidman 
in Cold Mountain and The Human Stain; Christina Ricci in Anything Else.
Best 
Supporting Actors (5):
Robert Duvall in 
Open Range; 
Djimon Hounsou in In 
America; 
Brendon Gleeson in 28 Days Later; John Voight in Holes; Alec 
Baldwin in The Cooler.
Best 
Supporting Actresses (5):
Ludivine Sagnier in Swimming Pool and Peter Pan; Keira 
Knightley in Bend it like Beckham, Love Actually, and Pirates 
of the Caribbean; Hope Davis in American Splendor; Allison Lohman in
Matchstick Men and Big Fish; Patricia Clarkson in The Station 
Agent.
 
 
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